By Carlie Widner
I’ve never been one to ask for help. I didn’t want to be on a dating app. I felt like using a dating app was “asking for help” so I put it off for a long time. I was more of a “traditional dater” and “non-traditional” dating just didn’t feel right. My best friend convinced me to try it out. She seemed to be having fun finding matches on Tinder, going on dates, and meeting new single guys, even if they weren’t husband material.
So I joined Tinder in 2014 after going through several toxic relationships over the years. I figured it wouldn’t hurt to try and meet someone in a little more non-traditional way since the traditional way wasn’t quite working out in my favor. I let my guard down and realized that if nothing comes out of it, at least I’ll get a free dinner or two. After downloading the app, I hesitantly made a profile and decided to check out some of the single men in my area. “He’s cute…” Swiped right. “No, not him…” Swiped left. “Ehh, gross…” Swiped left. “Oooh, hottie!” Swiped right. I continued to swipe right and swipe left for a while.
Then, “You have been matched” came across as a notification. I checked who I matched with. There’s a picture of this guy holding up a barbell over his head. The first thing I thought was “Hey, he does Crossfit like I do. I like him already!” His name is Dustin. He’s a year younger than me, but that’s okay. We matched, so that’s a first step in the right direction.
The magic didn’t quite happen right away for us. We talked through the Tinder app for about a month before I felt comfortable giving him my phone number. I needed to make sure this guy was legit before I could trust him. I wasn’t looking for a hookup. I was looking for my husband. He was persistent. He didn’t give up. I liked that about him. He didn’t seem like someone who just wanted to hook up. Dustin and I went on our first date to a small burger joint in town and immediately hit it off.
Just prior to joining Tinder, my life had taken a turn. I was a travel NICU nurse living my dream, working in San Diego. I had wanted to do this since I became a nurse in 2006. Finally, my dreams were coming true for me, or so I thought. During this time, my body decided to attack itself, mainly my pancreas, and I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. That’s when I decided to pack my stuff up and move back home, ending my “dream” of working as a travel NICU nurse.
Living with type 1 diabetes is not easy. I was nervous to tell Dustin but I needed him to know that my life was not as “normal” as for most. Type 1 diabetes was so new to me and I was still in the process of learning how to live with this disease. To my surprise, Dustin showed up. We would be out on a date eating dinner and he would pull out his phone to help me count carbohydrates. He learned how to change my insulin pump and continuous glucose monitor. He learned how to give glucagon if I ever had a low blood sugar emergency. He would bake low-carb snacks with me just so I could have a snack and have better blood sugar control. He was there for me.
After my diagnosis, I joined a Facebook group for athletes with type 1 diabetes and in 2016, Dustin and I went to an event put on by the type 1 diabetes community in Austin, Texas called Bolus and Barbells where we got to meet so many of our “online friends”. We had a blast! We lifted weights, counted carbs together, injected insulin together, drank alcohol together, and had an amazing time with all our new friends.
Many of our friends were joking with Dustin about when he would propose. It’s then that I knew…Tinder was my matchmaker. I had found my husband. At the end of 2016, Dustin proposed on the mountain in his grandparent’s yard. Of course, I said yes! On August 5, 2017, we got married in the mountains at a golf course, with a double rainbow to end the night. We used the hashtag #weswipedright at our wedding. Here we are in 2021 and we now have 2 beautiful baby boys.
I was very skeptical of whether or not trying to find my husband on a dating app would work. They say skepticism is good because it means you’re curious. And curiosity can bring good change in your world. Well, I’m glad I was skeptical of Tinder because that curiosity brought me to my husband. Now I’m really living my dream of being a wife and a mom.
I really wasn’t sure how dating would go while living with type 1 diabetes. I was so nervous and so anxious to tell him but once I did, he showed me nothing but support. It really takes a special person to be able to deal with the highs and lows of diabetes, but thanks to Tinder I found someone who was the perfect match and he handled me having diabetes so smoothly and never once gave me a hard time if I had to cancel plans because I wasn’t feeling well. So instead of going out, we would stay in and enjoy each other’s company.
At first, when people would ask how we met, I would laugh and would say “Tinder, we swiped right,” shrugging and feeling kind of silly for using a dating app to find my husband. But after a while, I became more comfortable with it. I tell people that it’s not easy, you weed through the ones you don’t like, or hit it off with someone, and you have to put in the work, but when you do, it can be magical. I’ve learned that it’s okay to let down your guard and ask for help. Even if it means using a dating app! I’m so thankful #weswipedright.